Shadowstorm Alia Slayer

[namara]

OOC Information
OOC Name: Namara
Link to Previous Character: N/A

General
Name: Shadowstorm Alia Slayer
Alias: Shadow, Shadowstorm, Rude Fae
Species: Lyxxus/Lyxxi
Gender: Female
Age: 3 Years
Pack: Loner
Rank: N/A

Physical
Height: 20 inches
Weight: 32.5
Appearance: Shadowstorm has bright, dark, dark pine green eyes, but that's not the first thing you'll notice about her. The first thing is her posture and the fact that she's jet black. Before you even see her eyes, she'll come on out with a rude sentence or two. You'll notice she's paranoid and she thinks your going to kill her. It's from her 'pup-hood' when some lone wolves attacked her family, killing her mother and father with brutal teeth. But it is not as if she necessarily loved her father. But she terribly misses her mother. She is always looking for her brother Shade. She is very 'cat-like', just as the rest of her species is. She has a soft spot for pups. But will still be rude to anyone. Her most defining feature is the fact she has a scar just underneath her eye.

Other: N/A

Mental
Strengths: Your wolf's strengths (5 minimum)

• Strong-willed; She won't let anything drive her from her goals. nothing you say or do matters to some extent
  
• Hunting; She loves hunting and is decent at it. She is well fed, except for when she injures her leg, then she nearly dies.
  
• Speed; She is really fast, she uses it to retreat when she has too.
  
• 'Steel Wall'; She has a slight soft spot for pups, but with full grown wolves. She is a 'steel-wall' meaning she lefts no emotions out, unless its a family member.
  
• Antagonizing; Most would view this as a bad thing, but Shadowstorm uses it i her strategy to make a clean get away.
  

Weaknesses: Your wolf's flaws and weaknesses

• Rude; She is always snapping rude remarks that will make wolves furious
  
• Stubborn; she refuses to follow orders of another lone wolf just because they tell her to
  
• Hot-Headed; She gets angry and 'boils over' very easily.
  
• Fighting; She isn't so good at fighting, she doesn't have the strength to be goof. But she does have dexterity.
  
• Swimming; She cannot swim to save her life.
  

Personality: Well, one can describe Shadowstorm's personality as a shade of many colors. she has to agree with that statement too. She's always changing. Her behavior different after every encounter. She is a bi-polar wolf. There are a few different personalities that come back more then once. One in particular. Her rude one. She was always snapping, before you can catch a glimpse of her, she has made a rude remark. But also, there is the kind and compassionate, while as rare as it comes, lasts a good amount of time. When those do not have an appearance to make though, a variety of things come out. There was a time she longed for a pack and mate, but that ended quickly with a few rude remarks to herself. At one point, she was a confused wolf and the only other personality to make an appearance, because it cannot be stressed enough, her rude personality. This. Is. Shadowstorm.

History:"My tale isn't heroic, or nice as your history I'm sure. But I'll tell you anyways since you're my friend. I was born to a distinct pair of Lone Wolves that to be honest. Hated other wolves. My brother Shade and I started training to survive in a place far from Relic Lore called Death Pine Forest. The first lesson my father taught us, even though I now, after seeing the strength of packs, was Packs are weak, bottom feeding losers that couldn't take care of themselves, so they hung together and shared food. He specifically told us never to join a pack, or we would taint our blood line. MY brother tried to object as he was the more reasonable one, my father beat him. I tried to get him to stop, he beat me. My father was a cruel, mean steel wall. Whenever I did something wrong, he beat me as a punishment. My mother eventually stepped in, conquering her fear of my father. She was too beaten. It got worse. During my final 'test' , a hunting assignment before I was to go off an live my life. My mother and father were attacked by a group of two or three lone wolves. Out of fright, I ran for his life. I thought all my family to be dead. My grandparents gone. My father was an only child, same as my mum as far as I know, I thought my brother Shade was in dead. But I cannot really confirm that. By the end of our lessons. He was set on the goal of never being in a pack ever. "

Other:I told her story in her POV and it was like she was telling it to a cousin or something before now.

[Somatra]

Hello Namara and welcome to the world of Wonderwhy!

My name is Somatra and I will be reviewing you bio today, hopefully we can get things going quickly so that you can get out there and start having fun.

I. You have listed your OOC name as Namara and your character name as Shadowstorm, it is your character name that must be visible as the account name and not your OOC name. Please go to your personal profile (by clicking on 'Namara') and change it to Shadowstorm by selecting 'Modify Profile'.

II. I see you have chosen Lyxxus as your wolf's species, a great choice! However, could you please review their pelt color specifications under the Species Guide? Lyxxus have bright (or light) warm hues for their pelt, ie red, oranges, yellows and such. In essence please change your Appearance in accordance to that.

III. Currently your Appereance only has 144 words, the minimum word requirement is 150, please elaborate, you could focus on her voice, the way she moves, and maybe mention that because she is three years old she had three tails?

IV. You have mentioned that your wolf is 'bi-polar', please be advised that this is actually "bipolar affective disorder' and is defined as follows:

"Bipolar disorder, formerly known as manic depression, is a mood disorder that causes radical emotional changes and mood swings, from manic, restless highs to depressive, listless lows. Most bipolar individuals experience alternating episodes of mania and depression."

Please note that bipolar disorder is a serious and relatively uncommon disorder and because of this I will ask you to remove its use from your Personality. Having bipolar disorder has nothing to do with displaying more than one personality in fact, it is a completely different matter altogether that afflicts moods.

What you may be trying to convey is D.I.D. (Dissociative Identity Disorder) which is an even more rare disorder, often mislabelled as multiple personality disorder.

Dissociative Identity Disorder (DID) is a severe condition in which two or more distinct identities, or personality states, are present in—and alternately take control of—an individual. The person also experiences memory loss that is too extensive to be explained by ordinary forgetfulness.

DID is a disorder characterized by identity fragmentation rather than a proliferation of separate personalities. The disturbance is not due to the direct psychological effects of a substance or of a general medical condition, yet as this once rarely reported disorder has become more common, the diagnosis has become controversial.

On Wonderwhy we do not include the use of such serious disorders in our personalities, often such disorders as misconstrued and inappropriately rp-ed in a character. People are affected with these disorders in real life and they can seriously harm activities of daily living, so to respect others that have these disorders we do not allow them to be rp-ed.

V. Please review your History, the sentences are very fragmented and are in some instances cut off by periods when they are supposed to be joined with the following sentence. For example: " I was born to a distinct pair of Lone Wolves that to be honest. Hated other wolves." should be written as "I was born to a distinct pair of Lone Wolves that, to be honest, hated other wolves." There are a few sentences to that nature in the History write up, just give it a look over and read it out loud to see what I mean.

Alright, so give those items a look over and then reply to this thread when you are done so that I may review the bio for approval. Thank you for giving Wonderwhy a go, glad to have you here and look forward to rp-ing with you soon!

Good luck!

Somatra